Currently Listening A Fever You Can't Sweat Out By Panic! At The Disco number 3, what ever the hell the name of it is see related

what a life.........

so i havn't updated here in awhile and i just thought i would

i am grounded

and thats all my fault no one elses

i'm the one who looked straight at my mother after she told me not to leave at 4:30 in the morning said ok and walked right out the door any way

i'm the one who will stupidly do anything for that boy

i don't know

i start school in january

excitment!

i work in Tire and lube now now that is an every day changlle

i must say i have never seen so many  pissed off people

but it's not our fault they fired like 3 of our guys and we our short handed

on another note

i miss my best friend

she had turned to drugs and may be preganant which is never good

considering how she has no job she has no idea where is she going to sleep from night to night

it just scares me

and i can't stand her boy friend

it pisses me off it's like she doesn't want better for her self 

i mean how can she not see that where she is headed is not a good place to go?

but any way i have been writting alot lately

it's my escape

and with all thats going on escapes are a good thing

you know when people say " with all that is going on" people automacticly assume the mean " with all that is going wrong"

but i don't feel as if any thing is going  wrong

things are actually just going

i'm not depressed ( this week atleast)

and for people who think i am depressed

fuck you

if you have ever met me i am a happy person

but the only reson i am such a happy person is because i write all the depressed shit down

so if you only know me through xanga or myspace

then don't judge me untill you actually meet me

but i think that is all i have to go shampoo some carpet now

so it seems.........

xana is dead and myspace is the place to be!

so is it just me ...............

Currently Listening From Under the Cork Tree By Fall Out Boy XO see related

XO

I comb the crowd and pick you out
My mouth moves too fast for you to figure it out
It starts eyes closed to fingers crossed
"To I swear, I say"
"To I swear, I say"

To hands between legs, to "whatever it takes"
To drinks at the club to the bar
To the keys to your car
To hotel stairs to the emergency exit door

To the love, I left my conscience pressed
Between the pages of the Bible in the drawer
"What did it ever do for me" I say (I say, I say, I say)
It never calls me when I'm down
Love never wanted me
But I took it anyway
Put your ear to the speaker
And choose love or sympathy
But never both
Love never wanted me

"I hoped you choked
And crashed your car"
Hey "tear catcher", that's all that you are
And ever were
From the start
I swear, I say
I swear, I say

if you want nothing beyond friends tell me now before i get anymore wrapped up in my own dreams, please 

you want a girl to make the 1st move and i want to to but.............

i'm scared that things won't go the way i want them to 

i'm scared of getting hurt

it just  happens way to often

 maybe i'm thinking this over  to much

maybe your feelings are no where near the same

tell me how you feel and i will make the 1st mve

or leave you alone all together

EDIT///////

To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait."

To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful."

To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see her.

To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick.

To every guy who has given her flowers just because.

To every guy that said he would die for her.

To every guy that really would.

To every guy that did what she wanted to do.

To every guy that regrets hurting her.

To every guy that cried in front of her.

To every guy that she cried in front of.

To every guy that holds hands with her.

To every guy that kisses her with meaning.

To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.

To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.

To every guy who would give their jacket up.

To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.

To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to be able to see her for ten minutes.

To every guy that would give his seat up.

To every guy that just wants to cuddle with his special movie partner.

To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what..cuz he believes in her.

To every guy who told his secrets and fears to her.

To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.

To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.

To every guy that believed in her dreams.

To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.
To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.

To every guy that wasn't just trying to get LAID!!!!

To every guy that actually listened.

To every guy that gave his heart only to have it shoved back in his face.


*****TO EVERY GUY THAT PRAYS THAT SHE IS HAPPY EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT WITH HER.*****


This one is for you...


Not all girls appreciate nice guys. There's not many left out there....